Comment Wall



  1. Hey Rylie! I just read your introduction and it was very entertaining! I love the idea of putting the goddess Kali into the modern day world. I also love how you gave her a sense of omnipresence, with Kali not only having different versions of herself, but her traveling to different time periods. This kind of stuff is really mystical and I love it being inserted in stories. I think you did a good job getting the audience familiar with the different forms of Kali, and I am interested to see how each persona differs from the other. I also am wondering if you will expand on Kali meeting historical figures in your story. I would really love to see something like that play out! Perhaps you could have Durga be involved in a real battle, and interact with a real famous general.

  2. Hi Rylie! I really enjoyed the way you formatted everything in your introduction! The split in the paragraphs made it appealing to the eye of the reader. I also love the way that you portray Kali as being almost universal and how Kali can take a variety of different forms whether it be through a sunset as a spirit or a living being that we can encounter. It is really interesting how the personalities are separated and brings an aspect of ambiguity to the entire story of Kali. I think it could be really cool if you incorporate Kali being personified by several different beings, maybe something even as simple as a chair haha! Kali could also have encounters from people/things of different time periods which I also found super creative. It brings a mystic and time travel feel to it all. I am definitely looking forward to reading about how the story of Kali plays out and I wish you the best of luck!

  3. Hi Rylie, although I have not read about the goddess Kali yet, I feel like I know everything I need to, in order to understand the stories that follow in the future. I realize that Kali has multiple identities. When characters appear in different forms throughout various stories, I have personally found it to be confusing, so I suggest clarifying or separating each character form per story. I think it would be interesting if at some point you combine each form into one story (maybe the last story). This way, the reader can piece together each characteristic that she radiates and integrate their personal opinion of each of her phases through your creative writing. In general, I like the layout and theme that you have going on. As we inch deeper into the semester, I think you should include each element of the goddess Kali's life by using illustrations, either throughout the story itself or as the background photo. I always like having a visual of who I am reading about to help me remember the story.

  4. Rylie, I really enjoyed reading through your storybook and am very much looking forward to reading more about the three personalities of Kali. With this selection of characters I think you will have so much to write about and explore! I am curious as to what time periods Kali visited and what characters she interacted with in each time period! Does the goddess of war, Durga, make a visit to wars that I would be familiar with? There are some rally great stories to explore with your versions of Kali and I like how you chose to focus on her adventures in the modern world. This approach really brings a character like Kali from old text and epics to modern day life for your readers! The different personalities of Kila also show how complex her being truly is as the personalities are so juxtaposed! I wish you the best as you. begin sharing the epic tales of Kila and I look forward to reading all about them!

  5. Hey Rylie!

    I definitely enjoyed reading through your story book. I like the way your introduction gives the reader a thorough, but not too detailed, introduction. I like how you emphasize significantly on Kali's different personalities that brings about different attributes. I also found the ending of your introduction very clever. As a reader of your story book, I feel like you prepared the audience well enough with your introduction. The first story, Durga, was a great read. Your detailed writing gives the setting of the story an extra boost. I like how you were able to incorporate Durga's daily life, and how that specific day was different compared to others. In other words, the build up towards the firing shots and sounds was perfect. The story really took a turn whenever the conversation between Durga and the nurse was interrupted with warfare. I look forward to reading the rest of your story book soon.

  6. Hi Rylie,
    You are such a talented writer! I was blown away with how smoothly your story read. It felt like reading a published work. I was really impressed with your introduction page. It gave the reader all of the information and context needed to understand where the story was coming from, and it also gave a little extra insight to help flesh out the story! I honestly read through it twice to try to find something that I think needs improvement, but I really love everything about your story. the dialogue is great, you provide adequate details to be able to picture the scenes, and the characters are given some personality! I think if anything, it could help to give a few more examples or scenarios to show characteristics of the war or characters' qualities instead of describing them. But great work overall!

  7. Hi Rylie! First of all, I really enjoyed the banner picture in the back of your home page. It has amazing colors and also drew my interest as the man is holding a head that appears to be freshly removed from another man. You may be one of the most composed writers that I have read a story from this far in the semester. Your writing flows in a very elegant way. I love that you are focusing on the three forms of the goddess Kali. Your introduction set up your storybook just perfectly. Your first story, "Durga," absolutely blew me away. Your attention to detail in the inclusion of her enemy Mahishasura was drafted perfectly. I feel like nurses have always been predominantly women, so learning about Mahishasura's perceived superiority to women as Durga was a nurse in the story was brilliant. I also like how you managed to include the Buffalo Brigade in the story. You included a tremendous amount of detail from many different sources in a way that they just melted together into a perfectly drafted story. I think you are doing amazing so far on your storybook and look forward to reading your final two additions to this project. Wonderful job!

  8. Hey Rylie!
    Great job and I love the concept of introducing Goddess Kali into the modern world. Your writing makes this and easy and informative read. I love that you included the story of Mahishasura, as it sums up the story of Durga perfectly. You portrayed the complexities of Durga, alongside showing her daily life. I'm looking forward to read more from you !

  9. Rylie,
    Immediately I am amazed at the incredible amount of detail you put into the setting of your story! It truly helps me to imagine where this is supposed to take place and gives incredible context. I am so impressed at your ability to write. I really hope you want to become an author because, to me at least, this is next level material! I am so invested, and the way you wrote this make it so much easier to love what I’m reading. I love that your story has realism to it but isn’t limited to just that. It also includes thins that we would consider impossible, like having demons and goddesses involved in our wars as humans. Also, the emotion that is implicitly embedded throughout the story is so good as well. It contributes to the entire feel of the situation Durga is in right now. Thank you so much for sharing this story!

  10. Hi Rylie, this story is extremely interesting!
    I'm really glad to be reading about Kali since it's not something related to Ramayana or Mahabharata. Not that they're bad of course, but since a lot of us chose to do our stories based off of them, it's really fun to read about other aspects of Indian Epics. I think writing about different forms of Kali is a great way to do the storybook and the first story is brilliant. However, I think that it would be better if there could be a bit more detail to the story. I imagined that your different stories should all consist of different forms of Kali, but the way the story ended make it seem like the Durga part of your storybook is yet to be finished. I hope to see more stories about Durga though!

  11. Hey Rylie! This storybook looks amazing so far, theme, layout, everything!
    I love the context that you give your reader, and the amount of effort you have put into creating a cohesive storybook project. The Durga story is fantastic, and genuinely contributed to my further understanding of the original text. I love the idea of a protective mother figure goddess who is also a goddess of war, someone who is a fierce warrior but also empathetic. The only comment I have to that you could really expand on certain things! I think your story would only be improved upon if you added more to it. Overall, great work and amazing storybook!

  12. Hey Rylie,
    I thought your storybook looked really cool and I really enjoyed not only the story, but the theme and layout of your site as well! It is really interesting to read on different aspects of Indian Epic stories and you did a great job of telling the story! Your idea of writing about different forms of the Kali is excellent and I think it's a great way to write the story book. The way you showed the complexities of Durga and showing her entire life. Keep up the great work!

  13. Hi Rylie!

    I loved the images you used on each cover page, especially the one you used on "Kali" because it was just so visually striking. In fact, I think you could incorporate more photos like that throughout to really spice up the visuals of your Storybook.

    As to the stories themselves, I really liked the character that you gave both of the leading women. They are so strong and independent and, what's even better, they know it! My personal favorite of the two was "Durga" because the setting itself was so intriguing and her character was just nurturing yet tough, just like you stated in your note. I really just like the whole concept that you're working with here in general. The only feedback that I have for you is that I want more character details for these women because I like them so much already! What are they really like when they're not busy being gods? Are they more human than we think? Do they have personal lives? Pets? These were just some of the questions that I found myself asking while reading.

    Excellent job!

  14. Hello Rylie,
    I loved how this story emphasized the fierce yet nurturing nature of a women. The main character Durga definitely retained the goddess-like aura, and it reminded me much of Wonder Woman. The first paragraph does a great job depict how a nurse's job is never-ending, from dusk to dawn. I also think you did a great job with the dialogue and establishing a friendship connection between the two characters featured in your story. It seems as though Nurse Nancy and the other nurses are in the dark about Durga's power and strength. I would suggest to lengthen the story and give the readers more detail about what happens next in the story. While we can assume that Durga slays Mahishasura, I think the story would be more exciting and interesting if the fight was described, as well as the reactions of the oblivious nurses when their one of their peers reveals a side that they didn't know about.

  15. Hello Rylie!
    I just read your story about Durga before this, and I think that both stories do so well to paint a traditional, strong female character in a modern light. I think that you respectfully and very beautifully made an Indian Epic story seen in a different perspective. Durga as a war nurse, and Kali as a COVID slayer is a very witty choice, and so relevant and applicable to today. In Kali's story, you did a really good job starting with a strong first paragraph. It explained all the background information needed and established a strong outline for the setting and plot of the story. It was also interesting enough to drag the reader into the story and find out more. Overall I think the story was well written and the only suggestion I have for you would be to lengthen the story and maybe describe more on how and what Kali does in response to this crisis, and the consequences and reactions received from her actions.

  16. Hi Rylie. The daisies picture you've chosen for your comment wall is very pretty and peaceful. It makes me happy to see.
    This week in comments we are focusing on visuals and images!
    The grey header of your introduction seems fitting. Something about time and space, the brick wall in grey seems apt.
    On your first story, I see we are sticking with the black and white, greyish monotone colors. I like the fact that you are sticking to one theme! It also feels classy and pensive. Then your picture at the bottom is much more light-themed. It is appropriate since the background of your stories is a light color. And what an interesting picture too.
    Story 2: Kali. No longer doing the colorless theme, but not neon or anything too bright either, so it seems right. I actually find the header photo very pretty and interesting. Certainly a reminder of the pandemic we are living in.
    Ooooh and the goddess of Contagion at the bottom. What a great pairing.

    I enjoyed your work, and I think you've done well with the visuals. I hope you have a good rest of the semester!

  17. Hi Rylie,
    I am giving you feedback on your authors notes for your two stories. I liked reading your stories as well as your authors notes. I thought they were pretty good. When I am doing author's notes, I try to let the reader realize where I am coming from and the choices I chose to make when writing my own version of the story I am writing about. I think you could make your author's notes a little longer. You could go more in depth about the original story and then add a new paragraph and talk about what you did in your new story. You tell us the main changes and I think that is great, it just makes the reader read more. But, one feedback point I would give you is talk a little more about the original story and the reader will be able to understand the changes you made even more.

  18. Hi Rylie,
    I love the modern depictions of Kali in your storybook project. Your stories were so creative in the way that you showcased modern themes while also paralleling the original stories of the goddesses. I have heard of Mahishasura before, and I think that there was another connection between the fact that Durga kills him beyond just him believing that women are weak. If I remember correctly, I think he had received a boon from a god that no man should ever kill him. He assumed that he was invincible, only to be killed by a woman. I really loved your story about Kali fighting Covid, who is a "pestilence demon." It is so cool that you were able to showcase something that is very much affecting all of our lives right now in such a unique and creative way! Thank you for this awesome storybook project, and I look forward to reading your last story!

  19. Hey Rylie! I cannot believe I just came across your storybook project! Thank you for leaving such a kind comment on my comment wall! I really liked how decided to include a bad-A demon fighting goddess that travels through time and helps mortals fight diseases. As you know, I had a similar idea to input the most relevant topic that im sure everyone can agree on COVID. I like how you decided to time jump from 1917 to 2021 that was such a great detail to show that shes been helping with demons who cause disease for many decades. I read through all your stories and you did such a great job! It was so creatively written! I also really liked your layout and the chosen pictures for your projects! They definitely tie well with your project's theme! Fantastic job and best of luck in the rest of your classes!

  20. Hi Rylie,
    I really liked the idea of making Indian gods and goddesses play a role in real historical events (and how you referred to World War I as the Great War, which is a nice detail). When I was a little kid I really liked reading Rick Riordan's Percy Jackson series and I used to get really excited whenever he referenced a historical event because it seemed to make the story that much more realistic and relevant to the world we live in. I got kind of a similar vibe from your stories! The Covid story was fun to read because of its relevance to our lives in the moment. Also, it is comforting to imagine that there might be some higher power looking after humanity. I also liked how each of your stories demonstrated different aspects of the goddess's character, e.g., Durga's role as both a mother and a warrior, or Kali's role as a demon-slayer as well as a protector of the innocent.

  21. Hello!
    I thought your idea of how to write about gods and goddesses having a hand in history was really good and I enjoyed reading it! I especially liked the idea of Kali killing off Covid- I wish that was real! I think there are a lot of really fun possibilities that could come from this idea, there really are endless possibilities! I also enjoyed the images you chose to go along with the stories. Good job! I enjoyed your project.


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